THE DAY HAS COME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

INAGURATION----- AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Never have I experience such joy in my life. What a special experience. I swear my whole body shook when they said Mr. President Barack Hussein Obama. I am so proud to be an American. Those crowds.
I wish I was there- but I just couldn't make it. Luckily all my friends thought of me and brought me home goodies. HOW WONDERFUL!
But in typical dara fashion- let me say MY REAL THOUGHTS-----

1.Aretha- you were horrible. You have the best voice in the world. I was waiting for Ashton Kutcher to come and out and punk us all.

2. John Roberts- why dont you fuck up history and every important moment in this world? REALLY JOHN ROBERTS REALLY!!!!!!!!

3.NO MATTER HOW HORRIBLE BUSH's POLICY was--- IT WAS COMPLETELY DISRESPECTFUL FOR PEOPLE TO BOO HIM WHEN HE WALKED OUT!! I was humiliated and totally pissed that people would do that. It was not the time or place. It was utter disgrace for people to act like that before such an amazing moment.

4.Sasha and Malia- I want to eat your faces.

5.Michelle- OH my Michelle. If only I could be a woman like you. You truly inspire me.

6. NO mean to make fun of the cripple--- but dick cheney in a wheelchair. Thats all I gotta say.

Goodbye bush administration. It's time for the democrats to fuck up now. I wouldn't want it any other way.

The Poo Poo Saga

There are many complications of having a dog in New York City.
Especially if that dog is a fat bulldog who happens to shit giant boulders on the street.

Lately when my dog is doing his business, people stare at me with such disapointment like I'm doing something wrong.

Truman, my bulldog, happens to go poo right in front of a trendy restaurant called Coffee Shop. Here many people sit outside in sunglasses and hats pretending to be somebody important. Soooo here comes Dara and Truman and while he IS JUST LIVING HIS LIFE DOING NOTHING WRONG- People will literally yell at me telling me how disgusting it is that he is relieving himself in front of so many people eating.


WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO FUCKERS!!! YOU are eating ON THE STREETS OF NEW YORK CITY!!!


Am I doing something wrong people??

BTW- LOOK AT THAT TOOSH!! GOOTZ!!

RESOLUTIONS MADE ON JAN 1, 2009

1.Eat less carbs- broken on day one after giant hangover ritual of two bagels. (it really works)

2. Dont drunken text- hahahhaha right

3. Drink less- The week from Jan 1- Jan 7th I drank six of the seven days. Only one blackout. Thank you vodka.

4. Be less politically racist- Impossible. The right are such douchbags.

5. Follow all resolutions 1-4

I got farther than last year. We are making progress Dara. Ready for 2010